


cosima tried so hard and therefore no one should criticize her

by EJwrites



Series: Tumblr Is A Hellish Landscape Not Fit For Fic Writers [21]
Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 18:45:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13129776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EJwrites/pseuds/EJwrites
Summary: cosima thought it would be nice to bake some cookies for her girlfriends before they got home.  she ends up getting very distracted.from the prompt: "i'm leaking" on tumblr





	cosima tried so hard and therefore no one should criticize her

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Agogobell28](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Agogobell28/gifts).



It had started out nice.The batter mixed well.She didn’t leave any ingredients out.She remembered to set a timer.Once she put the tray in the oven, she looked around.

Oh.

The counters were covered in…. well everything.There was flour stuck to every surface.There were globs of dough that had escaped before the final ingredients had been added.There were measuring cups and spoons strewn everywhere.She shifted her weight and felt sugar crunch under her feet.

Oh no.

She hadn’t even started the frosting yet.She looked at the clock.She still had a couple of hours before anyone else got home.She would quick mix up the frosting and then clean up.Easy peasy.  

In what felt like no time, she heard keys jingling outside the door.

“Shit!” she hadn’t even started to clean up.

“Wow,” Shay giggled as she dropped her stuff on the couch.

“I’m so sorry,” she whirled around.

“Cosima, I knew you were messy but wow.”

She tried to bury her face in her hands but stopped when she realized she still had the plastic bag filled with frosting in her hands.

A glob dripped off the open corner and slapped to the floor.

“I’m leaking,” she lamented.

Shay restrained a laugh and hid her smile behind a hand.“Here,” she took the bag from her hands and rested it on the counter.She took Cosima’s hand and slowly brought it up to her mouth.She licked a little bit of frosting off.

Cosima gasped.

Suppressing a different grin, she licked up her forearm with more intent, making sure to nibble at the pieces that had hardened.

Cosima moaned. 

“Don’t you dare touch my hair with that other hand until I’m done with this one,” Shay laughed.

Cosima groaned, half embarrassed half incredibly turned on.“You know,” she pressed a kiss to her forehead while Shay continued her work, “I was expecting you to be mad and/or make me clean up immediately, not get laid.”

“It’s Christmas,” she stated simply.Satisfied with her work on one hand she shifted over to the other.On the way she pressed a kiss to Cosima’s lips.

Cosima darted her tongue out and giggled.“At least the frosting tastes good.” 

Shay laughed.She repeated her process on the other hand.When she was happy with that one, she bent down and slid her hands behind Cosima’s thighs and lifted.Cosima, knowing the routine, put her arms over her shoulders and lifted her legs around Shay’s hips.

Cosima kissed down Shay’s neck the whole way to the bed.Shay placed her gently in the middle and sidled up to be even with her.

“Hi,” Cosima grinned.

“Hi,” Shay laughed.She pressed their lips together in a soft kiss of greeting.“How was your day?”

Cosima shrugged.“Not as terrible as I thought, but still really stressful.” 

Shay giggled and shook her head.

“And you?” Cosima continued, “How was your day?”  


“Same old.But then I got home and realized I have a lot of work to do later.”

Cosima groaned and tried to hide her face.“I’m sorry I’ll clean it all up.Right now.”She squirmed to get out of bed.

Shay held her arms strong on either side of Cosima’s arms.“I think we can work something else out,” she giggled.“Or don’t you want to?” she added with less giggling, arms softening.

Cosima bit her lip and slid her arms around Shay’s shoulders.“No, I think this will work.”

Shay smiled.“Well, good.” 

She pressed their lips back together in a languid kiss. 

Cosima slipped her hands under her shirt and ran her finger tips over her back.She tugged at it when she couldn’t get higher than her ribcage. 

“Just take it off,” Shay chided, just a breath away from a laugh.

“Right.”Cosima slid her shirt off.When she had free reign, she ran her hands from her hips to her shoulder blades.She immediately got annoyed with her bra and quickly did away with that too. 

Shay undid her own pants and tossed them away and then took Cosima’s clothes off in a hurried but careful way, pressing kisses and little nibbles on her newly revealed skin. 

Cosima moaned.

“Just a second,” Shay placated as she peeled their socks off.She kissed up her thighs and settled them on her shoulders.She leaned in slowly and pressed a little kiss above her pubic hair to ask if this was what she wanted. 

Cosima nodded, her eyes fluttering shut, and slid her fingers through her hair to pull her closer.

Shay grinned and slid her tongue through Cosima’s folds.They both made little noises of pleasure.  


Shay took her time, drawing it out until Cosima’s fingers became painfully tight in her hair and she could barely control her hips. 

Just as Cosima started to shudder, Shay pulled away.She kissed up Cosima’s belly while Cosima complained loudly with a groan.“Why?” she cried.

Shay laughed.“Because I know what that does to you.”

“I hate when you do that.”

“No you don’t.”

Cosima pouted.“I do right now.”

“You’re not going to in like five minutes.”Shay kissed Cosima on the nose and coaxed her legs around her hips.

“Fair point,” she murmured as she cleaned Shay’s lips off, loving the taste of herself mixed with Shay.

Shay ran her fingers over Cosima’s clit and felt her toes curl.She slid into her.

“Oh shit!I don’t hate it anymore!”

Shay laughed.She started thrusting and followed all of Cosima’s directions.She was done teasing.Now she just wanted to please her.

She didn’t stop until Cosima was done writhing and moaning. 

She pulled out and pressed her face into Cosima’s neck and settled her weight on top of her. 

“Mmph,” Cosima muttered.

“Same to you,” Shay muttered right back. 

Cosima kissed her temple.“You’re so good at sex, did you know that?”

“You only say it every time we have sex.”

“Well, you’re super good at it.”

“I bet you say that to all the girls.”  
  
Cosima laughed.“Only the ones I love.”

Shay snorted.“Why does that line work on me?Like I know you’re being a shit, but it still makes my heart all gooey.”

She shrugged, careful not to jostle Shay too much.“It makes you think of Delphine.”

“Aww,” Shay cooed. 

Cosima laughed and flipped them, her knee between Shay’s legs.“I’m gonna go wash my hands.”

“What?Why?” Shay called as Cosima rolled quickly to the side of the bed. 

“I still have frosting remnants on them.”

“So?”  


Cosima laughed from the bathroom.“No matter how horny you are, I am never going to knowingly do something that could give you a UTI, okay?”

Shay grumbled some unintelligible protest.

Cosima came back to the bed, a smug grin on her face.“See, thirty seconds and now it won’t burn when you pee.”

Shay rolled her eyes.“Be still my heart, you silver-tongued minx.”

Cosima laughed again as she crawled back over Shay.

“I bet you say that to all the girls.”Shay pictured Delphine’s response to Cosima’s over-protectiveness.Her heart melted and she realized Cosima was right.

“Only the ones I love.”She leaned down and kissed Shay’s smile.She rested her weight on one arm and ran her hand slowly and gently over Shay’s side until she shivered. 

Shay wrapped her legs around Cosima’s hips and pulled her in with a groan. 

She separated their lips to whisper, “Ready?”

Shay nodded.

Cosima grinned.Shay was such a top that by the time they got done with Cosima, she was so turned on that she could all but skip foreplay.

She ran the back of her fingers up Shay’s thigh until she reached her goal.

“Stop teasing,” Shay groaned.

“I’m not!” Cosima laughed.

“‘Ready’ means like… now.”

Cosima slid two fingers into her with little warning.Shay tossed her head back with a yelp.

“Noted,” Cosima teased. 

They went on like this, back and forth almost competitively getting each other off until the lock clicked once again.

“Shit,” Cosima cried as Shay turned towards the door.

“Ooh,” Shay gasped sympathetically, “Sorry, babe.”

Cosima patted her thigh, “S’alright.It was kinda hot, actually.”

Shay rolled her eyes.“Great.Another kink?” she teased.  
  
“Maybe,” Cosima challenged playfully.

Delphine put her bag down next to Shay’s, her eyes not leaving the kitchen.“What…?” she trailed off.

“I made Christmas cookies,” Cosima chirped.

Her eyes slowly panned over to her girlfriends.“Oh,” she blinked a couple of times in surprise but then her face melted into a grin, understanding exactly why the kitchen looked the way it did.Then she frowned slightly.

“What’s wrong?” Shay asked, already moving to get out of the bed.

“Why didn’t you wait?I could’ve helped.”

“The cookies or the sex?” Cosima asked.

Shay slapped her thigh as she walked over to Delphine.“Are you mad?”

“No,” Delphine rushed to correct.“I just like baking and also… the…” her hand feebly gestured towards the bed.

Cosima giggled and gasped theatrically.“You like sex!?”

Shay padded over to Delphine and pulled her into a hug so she could hide her blush.

“For the record,” Cosima grunted as she pulled herself out of bed.“They were supposed to be a nice surprise, but uhhhh…” she shrugged, “That didn’t pan out.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” Delphine giggled.“I was very surprised.”

Cosima wrapped her arms around Delphine from behind, wiggling her fingers to get in between her and Shay’s bellies.“Good.”

Shay rolled up on her tip toes to kiss Delphine hello.When it turned to making out Cosima proclaimed, “You’re wearing too many clothes!”

“Mhmm,” Shay agreed against her lips.

Delphine giggled as two sets of hands carefully but efficiently took her work clothes and tossed them aside.

They fell to the bed in a graceless flop, laughing the whole way.

“Eww!” Delphine squealed as she wiggled out of the sweaty pile of sheets.

“Sorry,” Cosima murmured against her neck.“I got a little warm.”

“Gross,” Shay laughed.

“It was your fault!”

Shay just waved her hand to wipe the subject away.She started kissing down Delphine’s body, much like she had to Cosima earlier.This time she paid extra attention to all the freckles and scars she passed.

In between rounds of catching Delphine up Cosima caught her looking into the kitchen.

“Stop worrying,” she giggled and covered her eyes.“We’ll clean it later.”

Delphine smiled and tried to escape her blindfold.“I wasn’t worrying.”

“Stop looking at the mess or I’ll make you roll over and cuddle Shay.”

“Why is cuddling with me a punishment?” Shay cried, sounding very actually offended.

“It’s not,” Delphine reassured her and rolled over. 

Cosima continued to cover her eyes.

“Shit,” Shay mumbled. 

“What?”

“Now I’m worrying about cleaning.”

Delphine laughed, vindicated.

Cosima groaned and flopped dramatically.She got out of bed, again, this time her limbs leaden.

“Where are you going?” Delphine asked.

“Well now I’m outnumbered, right?We gotta clean.”

Shay and Delphine smiled.They rolled out of bed and pulled some pajamas on. 

Once in the kitchen they put some Christmas music on, a slow jazz album.They traded off slowly swaying with each other and cleaning.Delphine finished frosting the cookies.Shay got out some sandpaper to get the globs of frosting that had dried on the counter for a little too long.They ordered takeout and it arrived just as they were finishing up. 

Cosima’s cookies were the perfect dessert. 

They put an image of a fireplace on the TV and put the space heater under it and cuddled the rest of the night.

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know how to end one-shots and at this point i'm too afraid to ask.
> 
> EDIT (12/29/17): user cos1m4 made some really shitty, asshole comments. they have since deleted them, but that's why there's some leftover animosity. i deleted the rest of the thread.


End file.
